It's like this....

The day is moving slower, calmer.  Some assemblence of peace seems to be nearing.
I ask myself, since I am aware others read my blog, should I change the way I write?  To protect them from what my true feelings are?  To protect them from themselves?

The answer at this time is no, I don't think so.
I am happy that what I have to say is important.  That it makes a difference.  That I am making an impact where maybe my words were not being listened to before.  If your making the journey to check out my blog, then it is you who needs to take the responsibility for what you read.  For some, I am overjoyed that they finally visit.  I feel important.  I feel loved.

In past situations, I have taken the responsibility and acknowledged what I could control.  I stopped visiting the blogs that made me feel awkward.  I removed the feeds and status accounts from my sight.  I did not speak of or attempt to solicit information about the individuals.  So yes, I know it can be done.

I "out" no one on my blog.  I do not do a "he said" "she said" scenerio because that will only cause problems for the parties involved.

What I do, however, is tell my version of how I am feeling.  How the actions (or in actions in some cases) of others affect my life, my well being, my energy, my family.


My first attempts to communicate are always face to face, in person.  But when the door is shut in my face, when the manipulation turns on, I will retreat, I will reinforce the protective armour, and I will fight if you back me into a corner.

I don't fight with manipulation.  I never have.  I don't twist things around to be what I want them to be for the sole purpose of what I want to have my way.  I will however, call you on your bullshit.  I will tell you exactly how it is and where you stand.  I have done so from the beginning.  I will continue to do so till the end.

And so I will continue to write, and hope.....